Staying true to yourself

Jun 14, 2024

4 min read

Generally, I am a competitive guy. I like chasing excellence, I am a 100% or nothing kind of person. That is both a blessing and a curse. The past few years, and especially this year, I have dedicated to self growth and very frankly - to myself. I revisited my passions, reconnected with who deep down I know I am. I made commitments with myself, I signed ''contracts with myself'' and started working towards making me grow, blossom and win. I take lots of inspiration from true legends of their craft, living or not. I hope these people, or their remaining brands and people close to them, know how inspirational their lives were or are and how much reach their impact has: #mambainfinite;

January this year I came back to pick up a long-time passion of mine, basketball. At least once a week I am working with a shooting coach, an ex. NBA-exec. (let's call him Dormey for the sake of at least some confidentiality ;) ), on general shooting, footwork, finishing touches and most importantly - boosting our basketball awareness, IQ and knowledge. Dormey has helped me a lot. He is probably the first coach ever that committed his time & effort into working with me. Instead of noticing my flaws and stressing those out to me as an obstacle, he noticed my strengths and shed light onto those. Not to falsely lead me into thinking, in Gen-Z terms, that ''I am HIM'' or so, never, but by doing so he created a certain culture of confidence, belief and trust into what we are going to do. Which, simply put, was: grow.

We have been on an amazing growth path with Dormey ever since we started working together. Once that happens, and one starts to get more confident in him or herself, especially if one has a tendency to chase excellence, it is very easy to lose a sense of reality. Lose a sense of who you are and what brought you where you are in the first place. This week on Monday we did a 2x2 drill where the offensive players, with some set ground rules, had to set a screen and play a pick and roll action. One of the guys in the session was playing full on bully-ball. He was aggressive. He would body people up, push, shove, pull, talk lots. He would reach with force for the ball (or should I say the hand) whenever an opportunity, doesn't matter if that was far off the court or in the paint, - all of that kind of still acceptable according to the rules, but in reality just really dirty and to some extent even dangerous. And just for the record, - that's ok, don't get me wrong to see this as a complaint! However, my response to that was horrible. I was having none of this & I wanted to answer back with the same or more. I tried to respond with this step more type of physicality, I wanted to push back harder, I wanted to be quicker, more explosive, to leave the guy behind, to ... destroy him. Did that work? Not at all. He got me at every step of the way, he demolished me and tortured me through out the practice. I felt horrible. I could not bare that a single second. I let the frustration take the best out of me and it got really ugly very quick. Everything completely in the contrary of the direction which me and Dormey were working towards thus far. After the practice, the coach told me: ''Hey what the hell was that? I have never seen you like this before. <...> some bad energy in there. <...> But, next time, I am sure you will do better.'' When it comes to tough times and similar experiences, my very first instinctive response is to disappear, to run away, to quit. I am weak. Or, well, I used to be! I am very proud that through out this certain period of time I developed some sort of a mental toughness. I never quit. I come back. I take the ball the next day and go to shoot again. I watch film, I analyze. I lift. I show up: Keep. Showing. Up. That, in fact, is where the most growth happens. Did I want to quit after this Monday? Yes, hands down. What did I do: watched the film of the practice. Analyzed every situation and angle of it. Was it difficult to watch it? It hurt. But what I learned is: I destroyed and embarrassed myself there. No one else did that. I wanted to be someone I am not, that badly. I am not an overly physical basketball player. I won't ever win the battle the way the battle is fought, but..: I can give a shot here if I play the battle the way I can play it. I am a good shooter. I have a quick release, I am good off the screen, I am developing a catch-and-shoot touch as well. That in mind, I am also a great runner with a long stamina span. I am smart, I can see and notice things rather quickly, on and off the court. Did I use that, was I myself? Did I try to out-wit the opponent, out-run and tire the opponent? Not a single time. It is as if I wasn't even playing. Never forget who you are. Never forget what got you where you are in the first place. And when something goes slightly to the side-ways, as the say in Top Boy slang: ''allow it fam!''. Seriously, you can only be as great as you can be. So don't try to be someone else and go try to figure yourself out. Stay true to yourself! Yours Truly